Monday again? Geez! It's been well over a year... you've all got to be sick of me by now!
Speaking of sick, I'll share a little experience that happened this weekend. It's not super exciting.. .but hey, I learned something new! I woke up on Saturday morning congested and with a sore throat. After waking up I continued with the morning routine of exercises, breakfast, shower and studies. Unfortunately, it was enough sickness to completely dristract me from my studies. I remember thinking, "today's going to be interesting"
I ended up calling the wife of our President (who is also the mission nurse). To take any type of medicine you have to get permission from her. SO. She suggested I take something called Benegrippe. I thought that it must be some kind of Benedryl due to the name and rememberd that Benedryl makes you drowsy. She assured me I'd be fine and off I went to take my Benegrippe.
To say that I was a little drowsy would be an understatement. My companion told me I looked and walked like a drunk. My mind had completely shut off and I think I walked onto the set of the Walking Dead.
It frustrated me to no end to be in this condition. It doesn't help to be a zombie AND a representative of Christ. We had had such an awesome week and I knew I needed to work hard that day so that others could make it to church the next day. It became hard to even walk very far without needing to stop for a few minutes to rest.
When I got home I was upset at how the day went. I was upset that my body wasn't functioning the way I wanted it to and that God let this day happen after such a good week of work. You may be wondering why I'm sharing this experience... but as I wrote in my journal that night I pondered on why the day played out this way. I learned quite a valuable lesson.
You know how you have these weeks or periods of life where things are just going well? Maybe not so smoothly, but at least where you're feeling happy and pretty content with your situation? That was me this week before Saturday. Everyday I returned home exhausted but excited for the next day and happy with my efforts. These are the types of peaks where naturally, we start to gain more confidence, where we feel like we know how to handle life and what it has to offer. Where we start to get a little more prideful maybe and even forget where happiness really comes from.
It's like all those times where the people in the Bible and Book of Mormon are blessed with prosperity and peace and slowly they forget about God and become greedy or prideful. It's then that the Lord throws an obstacle our way to almost put us back in our place. Why? To let us know that we are weak and are nothing without the help of our God. To remind us to be humble and turn to Him, not ourselves.
As we reach these peaks in our life, pride is something we need to be aware of. Pride creates more trip-ups, falls and hard-learned lessons. Eventually, one way or another we'll learn our wrong-doings.. but it's wiser to submit yourself to the Lord and trust in Him.
This sounds a lot like repentance but repentance is needed to cleanse sin. Pride is only a sin when we choose to be prideful. Otherwise it's considered a weakness. We can't repent of being weak because weakness is natural. We do not need forgiveness for our weakness, we need the Atonement. We need grace, which is power that comes from Christ's Atonement to do what we cannot do on our own.
How grateful I am for my crummy Saturday and the lesson I learned. What good it is to know that we are weak, but that the Lord makes us strong. I felt truly humbled at the end of the day. There are things to be learned from any small situation!
Love you all!
Sister Hawkins
P.S. I'm still a little sick, but don't worry Mom, I'll be better shortly! (and will only take Benegrippe before bed, haha.)
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